I need to write. I need to get it all out and clear my head.
I can’t really get there. My head is full of so much and yet it is completely empty.
I have arrived home. Have been shopping, taken car of the family’s nutritional needs for a few days. It’s what I can do. I need to be there, but he also needs to be there. We need the break but we also don’t want to miss anything.
I needed to remove myself before I could see things clearly. And by doing so I saw the errors, the mistakes made by others, the things I didn’t see – the spots where I should have risen and spoke my mind. Instead I put my faith in the system and trusted their capabilites, forgetting along the way somewhere that they too, can make mistakes. That they too, are always learning.
But no more. Once I get all these things out of my head ill be back. But before that I need to rest. And probably cry. But mostly rest. And then I’m sure it’ll all flow better in the morning…